How to raise our Kids

Don’t get me wrong by thinking I have mastered the art by practicing it myself or I am a veteran. I have got no experience in parenting till date and like all learning we do in life for future benefit, I am also trying to observe the skill and now trying to put forward a blog summary of what I think.

1. A case for reforming oneself before putting a roadmap for the kid
The fundamental mistake most parents do is preaching what they don’t practice. This will never work in raising better kids for future. We need to preach/teach only what we believe and what we practice. Most parents create rules that will help in bright future of the kid, but I will say it is a job half done. As a parent first one needs to reform oneself and show the kid the way to live, else you cannot expect the kid to follow it. For example a smoking father tells the son to not to smoke, will the kid learn?

2. Lack of ambiguity among parents
Before teaching a kid good things, both the parents must sit together and agree up on “what good means”. This is necessary to ensure no conflicting message is passed to the kid. Otherwise one would end up with confused kids who do not understand what needs to be followed.

3. Spare the stick and spoil the kid
Out of superfluous love most parents spoil the kids and lead a miserable life. A case to prove it can be found in Mahabharata in the character of Dhrutarastra who lost all his sons because he could not control the unethical behavior of his one son Duryadhana. We find so many Dhrutarastras in real life if we observe closely.

4. No Comparisons please!!!
Understand that each kid is unique and there would be differences in skills, personalities and priorities. Healthy competition among kids might benefit them in some cases but undue comparisons will do them more harm than good.

5. Identify, Nurture and Encourage
As mentioned earlier each kid is unique. Identify the unique talent in the kid, provide avenues for nurturing those skills and encourage them to progress in those areas. It is ridiculous thinking to assume that there are only few professions that will help the kid’s future.

6. Support them during tough times
When they are down and out, support them. Sounds pretty obvious, isn’t it? In practice there can be challenges. When they fail, it can hurt parents also. In that state of hurt one needs to ensure we don’t translate the impact to the kid fully.